No, Sadie is Alive and Well and Miffed

Sadie: I never asked for a baby brother.

Tucker: Play with me. Chase me. Let me bite your tail.

Sadie: I have tried to ignore him. Did I ever suggest I did not like being an only child.

Tucker. Come on, Come on, I will keep barking in that very irritating high pitch tone until you play. Come on, what would one bounce do!! Pretend

Sadie: Have you noticed the very annoying high pitched bark?

Tucker: See I have your bone, come get me.

Sadie: Okay I have had enough of this brat. What did you expect? I had to jump on top of him, hold him down, growl at him in a vicious and very serious way. Puppies are just not smart enough to be ignored. You are not doing anything to keep him under control!!!!!

Favorite Things

Long summer evenings
The laundry all done
The house clean
Dinner with no problems
Puppies that know what to do outside
Daughters that seem to be doing great
Learning new things
Road trips
Good wine
A mother who advocates Margueritas
Fountains that the raccoons leave alone
Health

Yes it is a rubber chicken with a purple bathing suit. What else would it be?

Historical Markers

I never knew if we stopped because my dad loved them, it was an excuse to get out of the car or because we needed a bit of history in our lives. A bit of history in the proper context.

We always stopped. Few passed by without notice. It has been a long time that I have been with the girls on a road that had any. Cross country travel is now punctuated by road side rest areas with cold water and blow dryers and McDonald's. It has lost some of it's charm.

I passed one on highway 12 and realized my mistake. I then stopped at the next one and made the kids get out of the car. Then, horrors of all horrors, I made the kids go with me the Whitman Mission. It was very hot and M-E was limping but we walked out the wagon. It sits on a part of Oregon Trail. A long time ago someone pointed out the trail in the desert. You can still see the wagon track in the ground after all these years. It is sort of sobering to realize that they are still there, visible. Tracks that held the wheels of so many hopes and dreams. It also makes it real to see even a short part of the trail.

We headed home after our stop. A bit more aware of the vast distances we could travel and the comfort of that passage.

Maybe we will look back at these words and pictures and these will be the historical markers of those that follow our journey in the future.

Trips

They come in many forms. They are forms of travel or sometimes a bad moment of dis-coordination. They often lead us to more than we expect or stop us from doing what we expect.

We just returned from Walla-Walla late last night. Does anyone know where Walla-Walla is? It is not a little bit beyond Yakima....

It was a pleasant drive, beautiful scenery. Little or no traffic. Easy to find the Hotel, there is nothing in the town that tall. A cute downtown. Good Mexican Food. We did not get up the nerve to try the Chinese.

M-E had "tripped" just before we left. She sprained her ankle getting out the boat at crew. Don't ask, I guess it is possible. So she was in pain and forced to stay at a hotel with no pool and no room service.

A good time was had by all. I made them go the Whitman Mission sight. They now appreciate their lives a bit more. What a life. Mary-E did not want to go to see where someone tried to force a new culture on others. I think she learned that we know that is not a good thing because it has been tried and failed.

See, Life is full of Trips.

Ms. Marion is about the Go do her Tri-Atholon

School is done. Summer has started. M-E is headed to high school. I attribute her great success to the teachers at St. Joseph's. They supported and helped M-E from the moment she was diagnosed with leukemia. Two years ago we started on our journey to this point. We have many miles to go but will make it with everyone's support.

Ms. Marion is biking, swimming, running, in Bend next week-end. With everyone's help she has raised $6000.00 for this effort. This is the last one she is going to do and wanted to get to $10,000.00 in honor of M-E. If you always meant to send her some money now is the time. The title is a link and will take you to the "site".

Over the past few months I have received several e-mails from Kathy Marion asking if __________ was someone I knew. More often than not it was. Thanks everyone.

What a Difference a Year Makes

We all have those big moments in our lives. Firsts that never leave our consciousness. We all have those historical moments that we never forget. Since I am so old they include things like JFK's death, 911, challenger. We also have personal moments that we never forget.

I have a whole bunch of them in my head between now and August 14th at 8:30 a.m. They start with June 17th at 5:20 p.m. The moment that Dr. Balter pulled back from looking at M-E and said: "We have a problem"

We sure did. We did not know for two more months what it was but it was a doozie. What more can I say.

I can say that M-E has had a chance to experience curly hair. She has learned what adversity can be. She has found personal strength. I have found out how important it is to let people help you. When there is nothing else to do, a roasted chicken does help. There are no empty gestures of kindness no matter how empty they might feel.

Someday days like June 17th, August 14th and so forth will seem like just another JFK day. One we remember but only for a moment. We are not quiet to the place where they have not further power over us. They will begin to recede when we add the "last day of treatment" to the list. It will get here. We are getting closer each day. Then we hold our breath for a very very long time and pray that continued remission is our friend.

Healing Ceremony

Healing Ceremony American Style


Tuesday July 18:

Depart Seattle before the Crack of Dawn
Arrive Phoenix at 10:30 some sort of time. Mountain?
Rent big honken SUV
( Try not to bond with gas guzzler)

Drive north to Grand Canyon
Stop at all the parks and look at big rocks.
Do not steal any.

Reservation at Red Feather Lodge
Plan to go into the park for dinner and Sun Set


Wednesday July 19

Go Back to the Grand Canyon Early before the it boils
Wed Hike, dehydrate

Thursday July 20

Leave early and head to Tuba City to find Dinosaur footprints.
Continue on to Chinle using "INDIAN COUNTRY MAP"

Arrive Chinle (God willing)

Reservations at Best Western
Swim and try to re-hydrate

Friday July 21:

Early morning sacrifice.
Making of Blood Sausage,
hang out and try to be politically correct and non judgment. Claim to have alergry to some ingredient used in the sausage to save face.

Meet with the Medicine Man and other members of the tribe.
Afternoon into the Canyon with a Navaho Guide
Hike, maybe go to Ship Rock or Swim and try to re-hydrate


Saturday July 22
Work on feast
Spend time with Medicine Man
Feast with Navaho healers and friends and family
Dancing, Singing
Enter the Hogan

Sunday July 23

Call Mom, it is her birthday
Head back to Phoenix,
Visit Winslow Crater

July 24 Fly back to Seattle

Birthday Invite

Almost 14

Host:
Sally Lanham
Location:
Lanham Home in Ballard614 N.W. 77th Street, Seattle, WA View Map
When:
Sunday, July 2, 12:00pm
Phone:
206-706-0708
Well, we made it another year. !3 is almost behind us and on to 14. Please come and join in the usual summer party fare. Your are more than welcome to add to the feast if you have a special favorite. I must say I might be convinced to fix one of my famous jello desserts.We look forward to you joining us.

We Lied -His Name is Sir Tucker of Berwick

He likes to explore deep deep jungles. He likes to try and make Sadie play. He likes to chew on yoguart containers. He likes to climb. He ran after Lucy. He slept all night. He and M-E went on a bus ride. He did not like the big noises.


M-E is exhausted. Her numbers are still high so they upped her chemo. They seems to do this every time. It always makes me nervous. It has been 22 months since diagnosis. It has been almost 24 months since we knew there was a problem. We have lived with leukemia for a very longtime..

Sir Berwick of Ballard (Ber) for Short

What can I add. M-E's puppy is alive, well and sleeping as I type. He is a sweet, sweet thing. He has a howl that I wish I could record and ears that become more floppy as he tires.

He has finally been named. I wanted Toad. Tucker seemed to fit. M-E did not think he looked like a chip or cappachino too black. Spanish names did not seem to work, Diablo, Negro Pablo. Chemo and Fred were also rejected out of hand.

Sadie is okay with this new addition. She seems more irritated than anything. She did manage to get on top of him yesterday and hold him down and let him know that all of the chew bones were hers, in case he were to forget. She makes noise but not much more. He has a healthy respect for her.

M-E is in heaven. She is great in taking him out and on walks (drags) and giving Sadie more attention.

He is so little that he can sleep in a cat carrier and has been sleeping about 4 or 5 hours in a row at night. I woke him up last night to go outside. He love to hide in the bushes and the undergrowth. He is very tenatious and aware of noise more than anything. Great addition to the family.

Pictures of the Big Day

Pictures Come Later

Yesterday was quite a day. Up early and head off to Mass. The kids were so excited. They sang and spoke and passed the torch of leadership to the 7th grade. M-E was asked to speak and was just too nervous so one of her friends, Summer read the speech for her. She received a big hand of applause. A glowing report card and a gold cord.

Practice, a long nap, a special dinner in honor of the graduate, Dick's Deluxe, Frys, tartar and a Chocolate Shake.

Off to church again. She was dressed to kill in her dress from Maggie. She headed into the church and we waited for the process to begin. Beautiful trumpet procession, girls on one side, boys on the other. Father called it the hormonal divide. Presentations, a speech, then awards.

I figured at some point there would be an award ceremony. M-E came home with two. A math award and an award for courage. Yes, I cried.
Both were a surprise and both were not. She has studied so hard and so diligently at math. She just kept at it all the time. Johnny was surpised with the math award and Ana pointed out that M-E had her head in the books so, so much.

The Joseph Boyle award was the greatest honor. It was a scholarship that is awarded in the name of Joseph, the child of the vice principal, Rick Boyle. Joseph would have been a freshman this year. He had AML and only lived to be 4 years old. It is such an honor to be given the award and M-E deserves it.

Then off to dinner, a sleep over and then a Mariner's game. I am sure the girls will sleep tonight.

The Countdown Begins

I keep thinking I should be more excited. These are the last few days of M-E in grade school. What I am coming to realize is that since March, there has been a transition happening. I read the St. Joe's stuff with less interest and have begun to attach myself to the Holy Names Community. As I assess those people I will work hard to keep in touch with and identify the new people at the new school.

I have known some of these people for 9 years and would bearly talk to if I ran into them at the mall. Some will always be dear friends. I guess that is how life will be for the next few years.

Mary-Elizabeth's speech for Graduation

I have been at St. JoeÂ’s since I was in Kindergarten. This has been my second home. I have loved my time here and it will be sad as we move on.
I loved Mrs. Smart. I loved the pajama party, the Thanksgiving Feast and the Teddy Bear Picnic.
I loved when we were big first Graders and Ms. Garrety taught us to read and we were able to go to Bainbridge Island.
I loved second grade, even thought I might have talked to much.
I loved third grade when we had the new teacher Mr. Lacktrup even he was such a good teacher even thought it was his first years.
I loved fourth grade when we had Mrs. Sullivan and she kept us so busy learning and writing and working on math.
I loved Ms. Dumas and getting to earn points for the end of the year auction.
I loved Mr. Miller. He was so quiet and only had cookies for breakfast.
I hated 7th grade when I got leukemia. I hated not being in school and seeing my friends, I hated feel so scared and so sick all the time but that is when I really learned to love St. Joes.
I loved that my classmates sent me cards and came to our house for service days. I loved that Mr. Boyle came to drop off dinner three of 4 times a week. I loved that the teachers came and worked with me at home. I loved that they made it possible to do work over the summer so I would notbehindd. I loved the cards and picture that came from everyone. I loved that people called over the summer.
I really loved that I had a chance to be here for 8th grade.
I love that we have had such a good year. We have all worked so hard to get ready to leave. I love that we are ready to go but I really love that we have had 9 great years together.
I think what I love the most about S.t Joes is that we will always have the history of being here. This will always be our first and best home. We know we can always come back. And let the 7th graders know, we will be back to see the passion play next year.

Tribute to those in a Different Place

This is my dear friend Maggie's favorite Venice picture ( The gold one.). It was taken in the Farrie church and is so 15th century over the top. It also is a reliquary. The little gold things that you see hold pieces of Saints bodies and pieces of the cross and items like that. The Italian churches are full of the stuff. But when you look at it it is shockingly beautiful. It is the thinking about what it is that gets you in trouble.

As we travel through this month and head into next, I am beginning to have those hard flash backs. I keep remembering what was going on a year ago and two years ago. June 17, 2004 at 5:22 pm our world changed. I then count my blessings that we have that sort of history with Leukemia at all. I look at M-E in the picture, taken in front of her favorite house on Burrano, and how could you ever tell she had been/is sick. It is all in how you look her. I see my daughter, who has been to hell and back. I see that she has great hair, a great smile, the picture of health. In my heart I pray every moment of every day that she is always this child. The one that "appears" so healthy. I know that someday, I will come to trust she will be okay. Just as on the outside, the other picture is beautiful.

There is always the cold side of reality. Over the months, I have been reading the blog of Diana. In February, her daughter Hannah lost her battle, as it was beginning, with ALL. The link is to Diana's Blog. Diana has a great attitude, she has a positive spirit. She has been through so much. She is having such a hard time with her struggle. It is a daily reminder to me that I am so so lucky. I need to look at the obvious beauty.

8th Grade Retreat

The kids are part of a retreat on June 5th. At the end of the retreat they are given a packet of letters from friends and family that expresses congratulations and thoughts about their future.

If you would like to send one to Mary-Elizabeth feel free to do so. It can be dropped off at the school or mailed. The letters need to be there by the 1st of June.

Mary-Elizabeth Sierra Lanham
Retreat Letter
700 18th Avenue East
Seattle, WA 98112.

This is such a great idea of a present to share with a young person. I wish I had thought about doing this years ago.

The kids don't know about this. It is a secret.

Great Artist

I added the link to this artist's web site. He has such a wonderful eye. His name is Giorgio Bacci Baik and he has a shop in Dorsoduro. He does these wonderful pieces and sees the world in a not so straight head-on way. M-E and I each brought back a piece. I love his stuff and wish I had some real money to buy one of his originals. I guess a new floor in the kitchen is the more important than art.

8th Grade is coming to a Close

I always get weepy this time of year. I was never the mom that cried when school started but when a year ended.

I am just so thankful that we are able to have another year end that I don't think the tears will appear.

Oh, aren't these figures great. They were in a store window of a store that was closed. We never wandered by again but I would kill to know how to get one. Oh, well a reason to return.

We are getting closer

Which came first the house and boat cover or the suit jackets?

M-E will be done sometime in December. I am hopeing before Christmas. They count the time from the end of one of her treatment phases. She will then go once a month for a blood draw and then every two months and then every three and so on and so on. They will follow her for the rest of her life.

I have decided I can not think about that yet. I have to focus on helping her with finals this week.( Yes, I can cook breakfast.) Then we have a lot of yard work to do this week-end. And then there is the week of no real school but lots of activites and then the week of Graduation and Mom and Dad visiting. Then...... See I have learned about little moments and not big ones.

Mary-Elizabeth's Math Reflection for April

Ms. Marion, a great math teacher, requires the kids to write each month about math. Their projects, their grade, their struggles. She let M-E write about Venice.

As parents, we are supposed to respond. This is April's Reflection.


People tell you that Venice has no streets but you donÂ’t really believe it until you see it with your own eyes. It becomes more apparent when you see the FedEx, milk and McDonaldÂ’s delivery boats float down the canal. Then you completely understand that there are not roads just canals. Whitney and I have been there before, but only on a day trip when we went to Germany.

We went on a Make-a-Wish trip. This Make-a-Wish chapter has never done a wish to just Venice. For their first time, they did a great job.
They flew us from Seattle to Philadelphia to Frankfurt Germany and then to Venice. Where we took a boat to the actual city of Venice. We left Seattle at 6:30 a.m on the 24th and arrived in Venice on the 25th about 11:00 a.m. We got to the apartment around 2:00 p.m. because Ruth lost her luggage and it took a while to report the problem. Vickie, a friend of ours, met us in Venice and stayed with us at the apartment. She helped us stay awake until night time. By the time we did go to bed, we had stayed up for a total of 36 hours. We slept like logs that night.

The next days were filled with shopping and touring. We went to big and small churches. You could not go 5 muntues without running into a church. We went to the Academia and the Guggenheim to look at the different kinds of art work. The artist used many techniques including sand with acrylics. We all concluded that doing the sand piece messed up the brushes.

It would not be a trip to Italy without having gelato every day. The 5 of us have become very good at telling what gelato is very good and what isnÂ’t. Whitney and I even have our favorite gelato place. The guy that works there is very generous with the scoops. Also every day we would sit down for cappuccinos or something to drink when we would get tired. It was a great way to see the city and relax at the same time.

I rarely felt like a tourist. I only did when we got lost, which was not a lot. We considered ourselves half tourist since we lived in an apartment for 10 days and knew how everything worked. We loved to wander our way through cool alleys, over interesting bridges and of course shopped on the way.

One day when we were there, there was a protest. Instead of walking up and down the streets they were in boats holding picket signs, riding up the Grand Canal. The police in their boats were there as well making sure that people did not get out of hand. It was interesting seeing this side of the Venetians.

The whole trip when so fast that it felt like a dream, a really great dream. Venice was a place I did not have to worry about homework or any of the stressful things that happen in Seattle. It was fun to relax in our world and explore it. We laughed every day and enjoyed every moment of it. It felt good to be normal again and to share it with Whitney, Vickie, Ruth and my mom. The Venice trip was a trip of a lifetime and I am glad I picked it as my Wish.

MomÂ’s Response:
I remember the moment she picked Venice. It came from no where. It was out of the blue. She had a first wish all worked out. It was denied. Oprah does not do Wishes. She was asked for a second wish and she simply said " I want to go to Venice again and live like a real person. I want to take Ruth and Whitney"
We went, we saw, we did. It was so much fun to watch her enjoy experience. She loved the people, the place, the food, the shops, the things to find, the exploration. We were so relaxed and so able to leave the last couple of years behind. It gave us a place to be so far way from Seattle and so foreign that there were no memories of the bad times. Only a place to create good time memories.
What a gift this trip was. I have not way to explain how wonderful it was. It made us realize that there will be a life beyond Leukemia.

Things are not always what they seem

Sometimes I have obsessions. Sometimes they are reasonable, sometimes a bit crazy. My sister has suggested I can have some special medication for the problem.

I have been kwown to search the world for such things as duck head hooks and pieces to the Dicken's Village. I have gone as far as contact manufactures to obtain a certain piece of material for my quilts. The internet is not a good thing because it makes my searches easier in someways and harder in others.

Well this is my most current obsession. I love this seagull. He/She is a venetian seagull. We encountered him by the Hair Ball bridge. He was struggling in the water for his breakfast and being the sort of people were were we thought it was a fish. It became very apparent that the fish had 4 legs, a long hairless tail and would be known as a rat inmost languages.

We were so shocked that we did not get the best pictures of the swallowing but when I can I will put the picture of the one with the tail sticking out of it's mouth.

As you look here you only see the calm and now full Seagull. See things are not always as they seem. Just under the surface..........

Red Maples and Daffodiles and Clemitis

Smell triggers memories. Songs trigger memories. Images do the same. This time of year the Red Maples scream at me of long lost homes. For reasons that are unclear to me, I have a mother that planted red maple trees at every home we lived. ( This does not include the Washington D.C. aparment where the maintenance guys came and dug up the pansies that I had planted outside of our basement apartment.)

We had a red maple in Ogden Utah, Spirit Lake, Idaho, Dalton Garden (two) and Hayden. There was one in Michigan, California and finally back in Michigan. She loved them and she left them all over the country. She also planted bulbs. It is just what you do, no matter how long you intend to live somewhere you leave a bit of yourself behind. Someone will come along and enjoy them.

She loved the surpizes each spring that came from a dead looking ground. It is always so much fun to see what will emerge and greet you at any given time.

I have followed her example for years. I planted bulbs in Dietrich ( both places). I left trees I loved on Capital Hill and here my mark has been made. Lots of things emerge each year. Lots of things I forget about and are a joy each time they come back. Many things I am uncertain will return. It is great that they do so with such regularity.

Maybe that is why Mom planted all those red maples, to leave something of herself behind, something small but tangible. I have driven by the trees on occasion and they do make a statement.

She planted a giant sequoia and was amazed with how much it has grown. She pointed out that it would have to come out eventually but then many not.

8th Grade Graduation

They are done with St. Joe's on June 7th. 8th Grade Graduation. 9 years of school is over. It has gone so fast but then life does buzz bye for the unwary. I have always tried to savor each and every moment. To try and not think too far ahead. It does not always work but it is something I try to do. We all need something to look forward to but it we don't want the future to be the focus. Don't the girls look great? They are both very special people. St. Joe's will miss them. I am luck they are still in my life on a daily basis.

Mothers Day

I AM SO GLAD THAT I AM STILL A MOTHER

Doors

These folks do not shop at Home Depot. I asked Whitney how old she thought some of these were and she guessed 30=50 years. I let her know I thought it was more like 300- 500. I may be wrong.

Sharing Some Stories

This is the Hair Ball Bridge. We named with what ever seemed appropriate. This is the first Bridge we crossed on the way from our Vaparetto stop to the apartment. M-E lovingly glazed into the canal and saw a hairball. She squealed ooooooooh and then we moved on. 459 or so bridges to explore and name. I never did find Ponte de Teta....

The walls are covered with lots of little shrines. This was stuck in an alcove. They were so sweet and it was such a drag that no one would let me chisel them off the wall. I guess I would go to hell and that would defeat the purpose.

Sunny Mornings

We had our share of Sun. Venice sits in a lagoon so there a lots of mornings that the moisture is in and then it burns off. Only once we really were wet and then it was Venetian Rain.

Off to work and to school today. Everyone seems to be back on schedule. The garden needs some attention this week-end so we will see how far that process gets. Bits of Venice are sitting everywhere in the house. Scrap books are being planned and projects are being listed. We will make use of our sunny mornings.

Coffee and Other thoughts

This is not Starbucks. Your are looking at hot chocolate and a little snack. We lost weight on this stuff. I guess it was the 5 miles a day we walked. I have been trying to duplicate the coffee. Mom pointed out that instead of bringing home a bunch of Crap...... I should have loaded the suitcase with coffee.

Our first couple of days we did not have enough "coffee and snacks" There are not nearly enougth pictures of us sitting and drinking. We learned by the last few days we were there. I learned a good capachino and a snack can be consumed around 5 ish and still sleep is possible.

We did run into Starbucks on the way back through Frankfurt but were not really in the mood. I can report that it was crowded.

Time to clean up the kitchen and get the coffee pot I did buy ready for the A.M. When I bought it the lady told me it was a four cup pot. I laughed and let her know that it might be a four Italian cups but was most certainly only one American cup.

I thought I would quit Looking When We Returned

Before we gazed with longing for things to come. Now I look to just check in on the living room of Europe. To see if the bell tower is done yet (covered with the white cloth). To see if the band in playing ( under the canopy by the chairs) To see how the pigeons are doing. It is all very much a fun peak.

Each day is better with the time. Each day we settle back in and know that we had a great time. Each day we have a secret smile of remembrance. When I first went to Europe in college, I figured it was my only time. Now I know that we just return in a different way. This time was very different than the last. The girls will return when they are in college and be those tired kids that have packs on their back and no money. It is sort of fun to remember and look forward to all of those types of trip.

Prednison is kicking in. If I kill M-E, please forgive me........ It seems to get worse every time. Surly, testy, B.......... Oh, bad Mom......

Oh my the picture is not the way it should be. I am not smart enought to fix it. Forgive me.

Coming Back to Reality

Not a bad place to be. Sometimes a bit difficult. We bonded very quickly with the Italian way of life. Cappaccino, bread that is worth getting to the soft inner parts. Subtle thinly sliced meats that are not overpowered by a layer of mayonnaise, fresh veggies and fruits. Not the variety but the quality was top notch. Whole foods is not a special grocery store, it is the market. Very little prepared food.

Oh, well we are back and this is our reality. Doctor's visits and work and school and homework. Coffee to fix in the A.M. Alarms to respond to on a daily basis. Grocery stores to visit that are 85% pre-packaged and lots of stuff that has been out of the ground or off the tree for a very long time.

Solution: keep looking. It is out there. Good Mortadello, good salami, good bread, good produce. We live in a town with great resources. A bit of ingenuity and the great stuff can be uncovered. My grandmother always said to eat what was in season. Apples are not in season, oranges are..... There is something to be said about that.

We had a great time during our Italy Season, now we are in a beautiful time in Seattle. I know better than to take anything for granted. I know I have to savor each and every day as it comes. I know that we can not count on tomorrow going well so each day should be considered a blessing.

It was so nice to go and to get away from our last couple of years of stuggles. Italy only had good memories. It was not tainted with doctors and hospitals and late night trips to the ER. Leukemia is so much a part of our Seattle world now. It leaks into all the nooks and crannies. I am sure as time goes on the memories of what has happened will fade away but that time has not come for us yet.

I think I am a bit rummy and will go take a nap.

Second 300 pictures

I love digital. It lets you go nuts. We are working on categories right now.

Windows and Doors
Bridges
Alleys
Animals
Gelato

I did sort of go door nuts but they are so wonderful. I have to figure out how to do the rest of the picture to Yahoo. I might be smart enough to put the whole file on the web another way. Like all things this is a learning process.

Certain amount of dread from M-E today. She bit off her fingernails last night. She has chemo and blood tests today. Always a bit of a worry.

Up at 3:00 , I am debating whether to try and go back to sleep.

The First 300 Pictures

God only knows if I will ever be able to figure out how to transfer the second half of the pictures. The ones that you will find are full of doors and alleys and birds and dogs and just stuff. I have not had a chance to go and turn everything so it is sort of like getting neck exercises.

A short version of our trip goes like this:

April 26: Arrived after being up 28 hours, decide the Water Taxi guy is too much so we take the regular transport. Find our place after hauling our bags over several bridges, find our person, settle in and decide we have to stay up. Off to find dinner and to wander a bit. Find dinner with a "turist" menu ( a big no no with the guide books) Order a great dinner. Did I mention that a Venetian specialty is liver and onions? Wander back, collapse into bed.

April 27: Up the next morning, girls and Vickie go to San Marco's to feed pigeons. Ruth's luggage is to be delivered ( total story to be told with the entry on the disasters of the trip). We wait all day for a no show. I go at the days end to find a church and light a candle. I find St. Alvise, our local Parrish. Little old lady tells me that you can not light candles during the day but when there is a mass, she will light them for me. My prayers are safe. Great dinner with little or no understanding of what we are ordering. We understood Tirimisu.

April 28: Try to go to Murano; "No Vaparetto" Es Protesto. So we head back into town and we find a garden, a few churches, try and are rejected by the Schuolo *sp* Ruth's Luggage has been found, she and Whitney return, we stay and go to the Fariri Church. We all agree Bellini is less depressed than Tintoretto. Off to find our way home. More good food.

April 29: We go to visit the Academia and the Peggy Guggenheim. Off to the other side of the canal and Dorsodoro. The Redeemptor church is also visited. Black Madonna, amazing space and feel. We head home, a challenge with full Vaporettos.

April 30: Vickie and I get up early and go to San Giomo for mass. Long trek a few missteps, rain in faces, lovely mass, attended mostly by tourists, trip up to the bell tower, feels like 2 degrees. Marvelouls views. Find Ruth and the girls, have dinner is a place recommended by Mr. Boyle from St. Joes. Sepia Pasta is great.

May 1st: Head to Murano and Burrano: Wonderful quiet day. We forget to eat until 4:00 p.m. We try to eat, they are too busy to feed us. Trip on the Vaparetto is fine, we have seats and Burrano is magical. We are amazed at the colored houses. We realize there are a million leaning towers in Italy. No need to go to Pisa.


May 2: Girls and I go to find Tintoretto's house. No clue so we take a picture, pronounce it the PLACE and move on. Madonna Del Oro, one needs a good dose of 13th century history before lunch. Off to the Lido and to ride along the outside of Venice. Land on the Lido, lunch with cars and the world's bicycles. We were so glad to visit but even happier that we did not stay there. Back to San Marco, more pigeon feeding, more shopping. Visit San Marco's, wonder more in the streets.
Home for a home cook meal, burned pizza, raw rissoto, great salad, and unknown zucchini stuffed with something.

May 3rd: Vickie to Verona, We take trip to cemetery Island,time at Florins ( only been in business since 1720) Served on a silver tray by guys in white coats. Expensive meal but worth the location, in San Marco's square. More pigeon's fed, off to see some more. Ruth and I to Mass.

May 4: Trip to Padua to see St. Anthony's tongue. (Tongue was closed for lunch). M-E and I head home, take the wrong train, hop on another end up back in Venice late. Go to apartment, change. Rest of gang shows up and Whitney and M-E and I head out in search of Gondola ride. None found, Stalking of gondolas begin. We have great ride and great success. Last dinner, last walk through the ghetto, last stroll on "our canal".

Home.
This entry will be edited and the proper spelling added at a better I hvae been up since 3:20. I have had coffee. I will come back to it, I am going to see if I can get the rest of the pictures loaded.

I was dead to the world by 7:00 last night. It will be interesting to see how the day goes.

Venice, a Special Place always.

What do I say. We are back, we are healthy, we are rested but exhausted. We are Jet Lagged, we are in shock of re-entry.

In a nutshell, the trip was everything everyone expected and more. There are always the special unforeseen moments. The moments of confusion and moments of calm understanding. There are the moments of excitement and the moments of pure joy. There are the moments of fun and moments of sadness. There are the moments of anticipation of 10 days of time and the realization that the time is coming to an end.

More will be posted. I will get all the photo's uploaded to Yahoo and you can pursue at your leisure. We are savoring the last few days time away from reality.

We made a wish and more than our wishes came true.

We are Off

This a link to the other Web Cam. Keep looking. You might see us. Don't fret, if I can post I will. We will be taking pictures like crazy. Thanks for all your good thoughts and prayers that have helped us arrive at this spot in our lives.

Venice, Here we come, ready or not...........................

Less than 24 Hours to Go

We leave Seattle at 6:30 a.m It is 2:30 pm in Venice. We arrive in Venice at 10:oo am on the 26th. We are getting more and more excited. Mom said I had to unpack 1/2 of the stuff I packed, Including the 9 maps and the 7 guide books. Here is the real irony. I need to find a book to read for me. Oh, well I am sure I will come up with it. I am sure it is here somewhere.

M-E has a big presentation today and then a spelling test and then...... We will be on that plane and life will be grand as we head to the Grand Canal.

The link is to the Canal........

Thoughts on the Passion Play.

I was only one of many 8th grade parents that dreaded but looked forward to the Passion Play. It was the first real moment when we realized that our St. Joseph's experience was winding down.

As every parent knows, being part of St. Josephs requires the heart and endurance of a Tri-Athlete (like Ms. Marion). You a have to be on top of things, ready for another flyer and request for more of your time, creativity and money at any moment. It is a pattern that becomes very familiar after awhile. You learn to line up the Jog-a-thon donators, the paper buyers, and the script consumers. You learn to put the E of E on your schedule along with First Communion and Grandparent's Tea. You smile when you see the kids in their Teddy Bear costumes or the 8th graders in their robes.

Watching the Passion Play was one of those special St Joe's moments. Most of us have seen the play many many times but Sunday the 9th was different. They were our kids. They were the boys that never could keep their fingers out of their noses, the girls that had their feelings hurt, the kids we all love. The kids that won and lost soccer games, volley ball games and track meets. They are "our kids", the ones that have been described as " Difficult". "High Spirited", "A Challenge"

But when they walked into the church, in brown robes, barefooted and chanting they took a step toward a bigger part of their lives and made us both proud and cry. I want them to know that they touched the hearts of more than parents and teachers. I was sitting with Whitney's little brother Parker,grade 2. He was watching in his own kinetic way. He was tuned in enough to know that the story he was watching was that one told by the Stations of the Cross mosaics we have in the church. He was trying to follow the story on the walls and watch the play. Parker was very curious about the Crucifixion. He asked how Jesus died, how long it took, why that would kill someone and why they put a sponge in his mouth.(He does not miss much.) We quietly discussed the physiological causes of death but I gently pointed out that Jesus only had to be on the cross for 3 hours. I explained that it took some people days to die.

Parker was upset that Jesus left the church dead. Hesaid, "He comes backs to life doesn't he!" I assured him he did but that we had to wait three days. He pointed out that the stations and the play both end with the death. I did not have the presence of mind to point out that the rest of the church points up to the life that was resurrected.

Thanks 8th graders. I am sure that Parker and I would never have had that moment. Thanks Ms. Marion and Mr.Savauge and Mr. Boyle and everyone else that worked and worked and prayed and hoped for a good result. It has been a challenge but it has been worth it.

Trip Preparation continues.

It is different this time. We have been here for so long and not been able to leave town for any meanful amount of time that it seems unreal. I have none of the pre-trip anxiety at either work or getting the house ready. I will clear out the fridge, make sure the cat has enough food. Sadie goes to Mom and Dad's tomorrow. I know what I am taking and have the suit case. The mail will be held. My neighbor will pick up the paper. He will take out the garbage. The house will be clean when we return. The neighbor's will be watching the place. Everyone knows I am leaving. The focus is shifting to simply enjoying this time away.

The fact is we made it here and we will strive to make it beyond here. I had dinner with Tracy Henze and she and I discussed my unending fears about remission. She remained me that we had and would do everything to keep this thing from coming back but that in life there are no guarantees.

This I will guarantee. We will be in Venice right now a week from now. I will be stalking Venetians and asked forgiveness in 153 churches. We will be looking for a small establishment for which to have snacks and drinks before more stalking. I am determined to have the group invited for dinner in a palazzo or two. Because remember, I know where they live, I have the maps. Did I mention we are going to try and see Pride and Prejudice. I found the entertainment section of the Venice newspaper.

Oh, Favorite line from THANK YOU FOR SMOKING : This is the greatest country on the face of the earth because of its endless appeal process.............

Easter Thoughts and Preparations

Mary-Elizabeth and Whitney are with my parents. Dumped them at the train and off they went. M-E had to take her higher dose of Methotrexate and her mother failed to send any Zofran. I guess this was a good way to practice for our trip. Note to self. Pack all the drugs.

We are planning to build good memories. Despite all my endless hours of research I think we will spend a good deal of time taking a vaporetto to a stop, getting off and see what we find.

Easter, the day of celebration after long days of deep contemplation. Make a Wish trip. 10 days of no cares after 21 months of deep concern and contemplation.

Fine Restaurants.

This is were we are eating at some point in our trip. It is simply a requirement.

We Will be On our Way a Week from right NOW

It has come to my attention that I am more excited about the Venice Trip than Mary-Elizabeth. I would prefer to just consider myself, more educated and prepared. I have had an extra 6 months to think about it. So let's see I have watched

On the Wings of the Dove, Casanova, Two versions of the Merchant of Venice, 2 versions of Death in Venice, Venice/Venice, Summertime, and several travel shows. I have read, City of Falling Angles, two mysteries by Donna Leon (set in Venice) In the company of the Courtesan, Venetian Affair, Water Mirror, Thief Lord and several I can not remember. I have read every travel book on the subject and have webcams as part of my favorites. I have located all 153+ churches and the best fabric/paper/book store. I am going to bring home, I hope, a Ferro. The front piece of a gondola for the garden. I am looking for a book called Ponte d Ponte, about all 435 bridges in Venice. I might try and find the author, he lives there. So.......... I have read every article in the last three years on how do do Venice right. I have made up a song to help remember all the Doges................................

Hummmmmm

Ode 1.9 To Thaliarchus by Homer 6 BC

See Mount Soracte shining in the snow.
See how the laboring overladen trees
Can scarcely bear their burdens any longer.

See how the streams are frozen into the cold.
Bring in the wood and light the fire and open
The fourth-year vintage wine in the Sabine jars.

Oh, Thaliarchus, as for everything else,
Forget tomorrow. Leave it up to the gods.
Once the gods have decided, the winds at sea

Will quiet down, and the sea will quiet down,
And those cypresses and old ash tree will shake
In the storm no longer. Take everything as it comes.

Put down in your books as profit every new day
That Fortune allows you to have. While you're still young,
And while morose old age is far away,

There's love, there are parties, there's dancing and there's music,
There are young people out in the city squares together
As evening comes on, there are whispers of lovers, there's laughter.

Who knew Homer still had some wisdom to share. I have been reading more poetry outloud to M-E she has the soul of a poet. She hates to write long things so this is a great form for her.

She and Whitney headed on the train to Eugene. They have arrived and are in bed already. We will be leaving a week from tomorrow. Excitment builds.

Make A Wish

I love these people. They do make wishes come true in lots of different sizes. We had our send off party on the 13th. We met at Red Robin and were greeted by "RED" a bevy of balloons and a very accommodating staff. We were joined by Tara and Keith our volunteers.
They had our tickets and itinerary. They had buttons, books, handy travel things. But most of all they were excited for us.

These are such dedicated people. They live their lives in a very special way. Tara works for World Vision and is going with a group to Honduras to build houses. She is taking a group of their child sponsors to meet the children they sponsor. Keith is working on not working while handling 4 or more Wish kids a months. He has a whole network of company's that help him. Skyway luggage will help any family. I believe that Rick Steves is the source of the books and travel accessories we received. Red Robin gave us a great meal.

I was impressed with how much they give of themselves. Their time and their enthusiasm. All they ask for is a report and our pictures.

I am now at the packing my bags in my head phase. I may start this week-end.........

It's Three in the Morning in San Marco's and their are puddles

If there are floods, it should be as the full moon approached. April 13th. It is close. We shall see. I love this web cam because it has the best shot of where the water should be. Keep an eye.

Peaking into Other People's Battles with Childhood Cancer

As a friend comes home from Iraq and everyone prepares to greet him, I am reminded of the World War II soldiers that would just never really talk about their experiences. They would not delve into those painful and sometimes unthinkable things they had seen. We will never really know what it was like to be on the beach at Normandy or behind enemy lines. We will never understand the horrors people found in the concentration camps. We can read about it and we can listen and we can empathizie but we can not know.

I have been looking for the blogs of others in my situation. Moms of kids, caregivers of kids. I have been gathering the stories and following the tales. It is interesting and sometimes scary to find a blog where a similar situation is developing or where the story ends. I don't quite know why I keep looking. I guess I need to see how others handle this situation.

There are several, Rose, she died on February 13, 2006. Her parents left the blogging world, leaving only her obituary and pictures of her "fancy car trip" There is Diane whose daughter also died about 6 weeks ago. She continues to struggle with her loss. She is in so much pain right now. Her husband also died sometime back of cancer. She has a son and a world of hurt swirling around her. There is mother, who calls herself lizard Eater (not a pretty name). Her daugher is 8 months old and had two tumors removed from her kidneys but post surgery things are looking up. There is Lise, a mom with Leukemia, they live around here. There is Kate, she is done with her treatment and has been ALL free for 5 years. All of it is mindboggling and very worrisome.

Reading their stories give me a glimpse of the despair other's have as well as that feeling of helplessness. It is so hard to know what to do for anyone that lives so far away but to know so intimately their pain. The link will take you to a blog. She is a good writer. She will make a great minister someday.

Success comes in lots of Forms

Yesterday was M-E's last volley ball game. Her team was late in arriving from St. Joe's. They had to forfeit the first game and had to win both in order to make it to the playoffs. Both games were very tough. M-E stepped up and did a great job. She made several points and was starting to show glimmers of her old self.

Ms. Marion was very upset that the girls were late. I grabbed her by the shoulders and reminded her that is was just a game and that things worked out. Well they did.

She has also been fretting about the amount she set for her goal for the Lymphoma and Leukemia run in June. She had enough to participate ($3500) but has set a goal of $10,000.00. She just received a very large donation (750-1000) from some one she did not know. She thought it might be from some of the readers of this blog.

Thanks to whomever donated the money. It makes M-E feel great, it makes Ms. Marion go into the water less reluctantly, it make the Boyles and myself smile.

Lots of good things happen from strange and places. Thanks to everyone.

Now we are worried about the Passion Play this afternoon. First performance 5:30 St. Joes.

If you Make it Pink, No will notice anything else.

No one notices the cut off legs, or the irregular edge or the imprefect flowers. that is the Magic of PinK.

I think we are really going!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I have read about, talked about, mentally planned for it, looked at it (It was beautiful this morning) Lots of people in San Marco's, lots of boat on the canal, lots of activity. I am beginning to believe we are going to make it.

Six months had made such a difference. I went to M-E's volley ball game. Her serve is steady, she had some good hits. They lots but then someone has to do so. She has a solo in the Passion Plan at school the trip homework is going to be manageable.

For History:
Teacher: Just have fun, learn, know that you will have a special understanding.
Mom: I will make sure they: memorize all the doses, identify and find each item in Venice that was stolen and determine it's place of origin.
Math: Just go and have a good time.
Science: I suggested we bring back some Canal Water. Mr. Newman sent home 13 collection vial's. Can you see us getting stopped at customs with toxic waste
Religion: We will be lighting a candle in all 152 churches.
Art: See all masterpieces.
English: Finish reading. Keep a journal.
Spanish: See if the Italians know it.

We are going to Venice. I am getting so excited. Now if I could just come up with a few converters? Does anyone have one I could borrow for a couple of weeks?