So as you bobb along.... Others are being caught up in storm of unknown crazyness

So you are sitting in church after being gone way too long and you have a guest so you are a bit distracted. You are wondering if some of your friends are there and you know, long morning.  Then there are the prayers and someone mentions a name of someone you know, someone you know very well, someone you have known since before they were born, someone that sort of went to St. Joe's because you said it was a good idea.  Someone that you have watched grow up and struggle and thrive and struggle some more.  Then you ask and someone tells you the same prayer was requested last week and then you panic a bit.

You sort of let it go out of your mind and start to look for the number on Monday. You leave a message for the dad, he is gone for a couple of days (worry increases)  You call the church and they don't know or are not telling. You leave a message for another friend, you take a look at facebook.  Yeah hospital is mentioned, more panic, You call your daughter to see if she can sleuth something out and then just wait for the calls to be returned.

Then the call comes, first from Dad, then from Mom, oh, yeah, not immediate disaster, not good.  Lots of things going on, Kidney, Liver, heart complications, lots to think about.  Immediately go into helping mode.  Easy switch.  Encouraging, suggest letting people help is a good thing.  Makes helping wanna be's happy.  Let Mom know that it is okay for someone else to rake the leaves, do the laundry and bring dinner over many times.

It is okay to make a list and let other's do some of the ordinary things that need to be done.  Oh, do I know that it is possible. 

Then pray, bargain a bit with God for someone else's child.  Try to figure what would help now, so here is the plan.  Pick up good coffee and some good treats, pick out a Mary to stay while needed in the hospital.  Find something to maybe help person interact with his younger brother. 
Pray,
Be thankful for the fact that we are just bobbing a long.

Birds are gathering and other things to think about.

So the birds, they birds, they birds.  They are hungry and demanding and going through at least two feeders a day.  Let me tell you, if I am dilatory about the refilling process, they let me know.

I am trying not to read anything into it but then a little voice in the back of my head is saying...... Winter is coming, Winter is coming.

I guess we are sort of ready.  I am going to harvest the three beets, 6 carrots and mound of potatoes this week-ed.  There will be a nice pile of green tomatoes and one or two Scarlett runner beans.  I think that is about it.  I hate to under estimate the importance of signs. 

So be forewarned.  It might be a bad winter. 

I have attached a couple of the pictures of my yard.  I realized they look like last years pictures.  Time to do something radical.  I guess I have a long winter to think about it.  I have a couple of trees to plant, some garlic to get in, some grapes to deal with some way.  I have fruitcakes to bake, and drawers to sort out.  I think I am booked for the near future.

Life is good.  A child at college is good.  Fall is good.  It is sort of like that quiet time of day just before the sun departs the sky.  A time of preparation.

Flat table Tops and other thoughts.

I have a house with no storage. So I tend to be a piler. I pile stuff on the table, the piano and then on the desk and the counter/eating area. It seems to be a problem. I would like to think it is from a lack of cupboards, or drawers or other places to put things. I am beginning to think it is just a problem.

I did some digging this week-end and began to discover the benefit of flat surfaces and bags that came from the flat surfaces in the past. It is sort of like a treasure hunt. Long forgotten items. Many of no value, some of great sentiment, all a surprise. So there probably is not a place for most of it in the permanent collection. There is a need to let it go and jot a note for the remembering times of life.

I must continue to sort. I am starting in one part of the room and moving out. I figure I won't be penned in that way. Pushing things out of the corners, into the middle and then out the door.

Things I am not doing:

I am not dealing with pictures. They are gathering in their own boxes.

I figure that for everything needs a new home. Chutes and Ladders goes, Scrabble stays.

I think I am working toward me having a new home but this process must happen first.

NO LORI THE LAUNDRY IS NOT ALL FOLDED. YET......

Moments of Sweeping or Folding

Lupe used to sweep, Father Gustavo used to sweep. It was something that happened every day and without haste. I think it is important to learn this form of "meditation" I don't sweep. I fold. Now don't think I fold cloths, NEVER! I fold fabric.

I take it all off the shelf and I refold it. I start at one side and move down the shelves. I find that it is a calming process. I find forgotten fabric, I find fun fabric, I find fabric I have loved, some I have hated and some I just ponder about. I let go of some, I plan new quilts for some, think of new and inventive ways to use it. I know that we require businesses to do inventories, to take stock in a calm way.

Pictures next.

Fruitcake

10 pounds of cherries-green and red, pineapple- red and yellow, orange peel-orange and 4 green glace' figs, one pound of raisins, two bottles of brandy. Let sit for 30 days. Add brandy as needed.

Be nice to Sally and maybe she will share.

60 percent to a cure.

As anyone that ever read this blog knows, I hate days that are the 13th. It reminds me of one of my personal "never ever going to forget the instant that....". days. That being said September 13th is my all time favorite day. It beats Christmas and Thanksgiving and my birthday months.

.

September 13, 2004 was the day that they declared Mary-Elizabeth to be in remission. She had been in treatment for a month and had failed the day 7 remission bone marrow. I did not understand the importance of her going into remission on that day at the time, I was just greatly relieved.

Since that date she has been through a lot. Lots of treatment, lots of side-effects, lots and lots of every thing. But then she has not been through a bone marrow transplant. These are good things.

4 more years and she will be cured.

Right now we take it one year at a time.

Do you remember where you were when?

each of us have events that are seared into our brains. Some personal some universal.


Mine:

1. The day they took my brother away to the Nampa State Home
2. The Day we left Idaho for Washington DC
3. The Day John F. Kennedy was killed
4. The Day Robert Kennedy was killed
5. The day the Space Shuttle blew up
6. The moment I realized I was pregnant
7.. The moment MEB was diagnosed
8. 911
9. the first time I tried Sushi and did not throw up.

I am always amazed at what we remember.

I just know that on 9-11 I began to apply a new rule to my life. NEVER EVER TURN ON THE TELEVISION WHEN NPR CALMLY SAYS : THERE APPEARS TO BE FIRE IN THE WORLD TRADE CENTER

Conflicts in Life

It is not alright to burn Bibles or Korans
vs
We have a right to burn Bibles or Korans

This is a country built on Religious Freedom but the very people that wave the flag and demand the right to burn Korans, also do not want to have a Mosque built. The burners will trade their right to burn for a promise to limit where a place for free worship will be built. It is so confusing.

We are a country of free people. This is not Pre-civil war times when only part of the people were free. Oh, that is right women weren't people at one time.

I don't understand the thinking but grant that they have the right to think that way. Trust me the world would be very unhappy if my way of thinking was imposed on everyone.

Drip coffee, white bread and Sunny D would be banned. Fruit Stickers would have to go, ketchup in small packages would be eliminated along with the people that pull out in the intersection and wait for the light to change. See, better to be a free society.

I also hate the death penalty but it might have to instituted for bad drivers.

Package arrived.

It was big it was red it was noticed. She is happy.

The Package has not arrived.

How could it be missed. It was huge, it was red, it had Mickie Mouse on the front and back. Life is not fair sometimes. It might be in another person's box. I suggested to the child that she ask. Something she is loathed to do. But then if she wants it she will ask.

I have a more important issues. I have lost my favorite ( and only) long rain coat. If I was smart I would have more than one but it was my favorite and I have had it for about 15 years. Oh, well maybe I can find a new favorite.

Today it is raining. Even Tucker does not want to go outside.

Writing Letters

It is a lost art. I realized this morning that I never did achieve the perfect place to write. That perfect place would be a fine writing desk that has a view of an endless garden in the English Countryside. The house would be heated by multiple fire places and staffed by a group of adoring much loved servants that knew their place. There would be some mist falling while I penned long thoughtful sentences on fine parchment with a gold tipped quill pen.

Okay so back to reality. No great surface. It is covered with papers and photo's and other miscellaneous junk. The view is of a palm tree. The pen is good but the favorite pen has decided not to flow appropriately. The letters are written. Not great words but words that might bring a smile to the new group of college girls that are so happy to be in their dorms without their mothers.

My Sister says I am not reacting in a normal way.

So I guess I am not properly grieving the loss of my daughter. I have not lost her, know exactly where she is. She is happy and healthy and doing her laundry, going to class and having fun with her friends. I am working on sorting and cleaning and working on projects. Maybe in three or four years when I am done with the main floor, will miss her.

I am getting bad mother points.

I took a Snow Day

I often have moments of sheer exhaustion at being in contact with everyone. I so wish had a place that was not so connected. How do we get to the quiet place if we have Wireless, Wifi, Blackberry telephones, computers that are all hooked up. How do we get to the books or the silence when it s just all sitting there screaming at us.

I just pretended that none of it existed. I sent an e-mail to my assistant, called my mother (sort of cheating) and turned off the phone and the computer and did not look at the Blackberry.

I took a deep breath and walked the dogs, dropped some stuff off at Goodwill, returned some unneeded items to Bed Bath and Beyond and took lots of deep breaths and cleaned the top of my counter top. It is not good to spill the rice. Sadie likes it raw.

No word from the Gonzaga child she is probably studying and is sure she is going to fail but then she always thinks that because she is not a million pages ahead of herself. I just hope I helped her find a way to find the quiet.

Now What....

That is what everyone keeps asking. So I guess this is What.

There are a million and one things that need to be done. Stupid little things that always seemed to be put on the back burner like matching the socks and purging as I go. It appears that if the dark socks are as dirty as the white socks, maybe they should all go into the Goodwill bag.

The three new chairs I bought need new seat covers. I know that out in the garage the tools for that job exist. So when I get there I will feel the need to organize and not get back to the chairs but rather find things that need to go to Goodwill. It will be a mystery as to how long it will take to get back to the chairs.

I was contacted yesterday by a group that need to store a student here for a month. He is from Korea and that should be interesting. I better see if I can clear a path to the upstairs bedroom. But is he is coming then maybe I should take the rug I was going to put up there to be cleaned and then send the one that is up there to Goodwill.

Child update: No news, I think that is good news.