It is always a bit of both. Give a little, take a little. Leave a little.
So we cooked. People came. People ate. Food mounded on the table. Our tiny turkey of only 21 pounds went on to feed the world. It took three days to do the dishes but what the heck. Better to spend time together with Friends and Family then to have a clean house.
For some reason I find I am doing lots of breath holding. But tests are coming and I am always afraid of what they will find. I just keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. The one that will stick to the floor and not return. I know it is nuts to trust the Universe and also Nuts to not trust the Universe. Childhood Cancer is such a monster. A hideous multi-headed Medusa. Enough. So many kids did not make it to this Thanksgiving and more will be missing next year. Losses just make it more important to keep going and gathering those we love close and closer.
Looking forward and not backward. Pretending there is a long future but know it is not the case for everyone. So as the knives slip into their designated places, I plan for Christmas Eve. Crab Bisque, Beecher Cheese and Tomato Soup. Come one, Come all. Come for the adoration of the Soup Tureen. (We even found the soup bowls)
Twenty Years, Two Hundred and Forty Months, Seven Thousand Days, and Three Hundred Days. Since we started chasing Leukemia.
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