Totality. It really is a misnomer. Some things are so powerful that even when they totally cover an object, the object can not be obscured. It can be changed and altered, but it can not be obliterated.
Totality is something that can not be explained unless you experience it. Childbirth, seeing the
Grand Canyon, being with someone when they die, seeing a bird hatch from an egg, watching whales spout in the ocean, hearing a symphony play a favorite piece of music, walking through a museum and happening upon a favorite painting.
Words are insufficient.
But once you do have the experience, you are forever changed.
We went to see the Total Eclipse. The Total Experience is life changing. During the hour and a half dozens of things become apparent.
1. It takes a while to develop but seems to recede more quickly.
2. While the light remains eerie, it is still there. It doesn't take much to light up the world. Even a tiny bit is impressive.
3. The sun actually heats the earth efficiently. Even when it is half-way gone, it becomes much cooler, quickly.
4. During Totality, it is possible to see the edges of the shadow of the moon. You feel like you are under a bowl of darkness with dusk around you.
5. Even at the darkest moments many of your friends provide much-needed support and light.
6. Seeing the stars midday reminds you of what is in plain sight, if only you are in the right place to see them.
7. The Corona is much more than a flash of light. It is magical, powerful and the memory won't ever leave you.
Sort of like having a Cancer Kid. Parents can't ever explain what it is like. It never goes away. You live in uncertain darkness, not knowing if it will return. The world looks the same, but there is a chill in the air.
You are trapped under a bowl with no way to reach the edges and enter the light. Even when Cancer "left" for good. Despite how close you are to reaching the edge, they keep moving it. The worry and long-term side-effects haunt your dreams and your waking moments. There is no way to ever believe the monster will not return. It is hiding ready to spring back if only we knew where to look and how to look for it.
Both are an experience that changes your life forever.
This is my Cancer Kid taking photos of Totality. She had already been changed forever. This was just one more thing and a great thing.
