The PIIC Line gave out yesterday

I was having a great time. I was doing a deposition where the deponant didn't know his name. We were making great progress. He was beginning to have a return of memory and we were at the point where his attorney was tapping him on the sleeve. That is always a good sign. The receptionist came in with that look on her face. My office had called and Mary-Elizabeth had been taken to the hospital because her line was leaking.

I knew that could not be a good thing. I have had four months of "My Kid Has Cancer" training I went back into the room. Asked a really great question and then rushed to the hospital. There she sat, watching Ellen Degeneris and smiling. Her line was out and she could go swimming. This was a good and cherished moment. No blood squirting out of the line, not swollen arm where the fluid was going to the wrong place, no apparent trauma.

No worries about Chemo scheduled on Friday or the need to have 3 liters of fluid a day. No, just thinking about swimming. The worry was not sticking to her. No, that is still my job. I am the designated worrier.

When do we have to have a new one.? How will I keep her hydrated? What is involved in moving the line from the right arm to the left? Is the line longer because of it's placement? Will this one work like the old one? Will we get through this phase without having it replaced? What does this do to my work schedule? Can I ever leave her alone again even for a minute? Where is Orion this morning? Who thought about putting stickers on fruit and why aren't they cute? Does Linsey Lohan really only drink a little bit? When will the Cubs win the world's series? If four months seems like a life time, how can 4 more years not be eternity? Oh, God how long have I had Adult ADD and what is the name of the medication that will cure me? When did television become the main source of medical information via Pharmacy commercials? Will I ever feel like life is just not crazy again?

See, I do a great job at worrying. I need a life. A real life. I will worry about that later.

Here is the plan. At 7:00 a.m. we leave for the hospital. We have to be at surgery at 7:45 a.m. They plan to insert a new PIIC line around 9:00 a.m. She then needs to spend some time in clinic while they draw blood, do an exam and then give her some chemo. I then bring her home , hook her up to Baxter, our new infusion pump and go from there. Sounds simple, I am pretending it is routine. I am praying she does not have a fever. I am praying that the anethisiaolgist that I relentlessly harrassed and deposed and tortured is not in the operating room. I hope she does not get sick from the Chemo, I hope she does not react badly to the procedure, I hope that we get through the next few days.