Something Sweet My Cousin Wrote or Sent Me, Something I thought was worth Sharing

"What's it like to be getting older?" I was asked. The other day a young person asked me how I felt about getting older. I was taken aback, for I do not think of myself as old. Upon seeing my reaction, she was immediately embarrassed - - but I explained that it was an interesting question, and I would ponder it, and let her know.
Old age, or getting older, I decided, is a gift. I am now, probably for the first time in my life, the person I have always wanted to be.
Oh, not my body! I sometime despair over my body- the cellulite, the wrinkles, the baggy eyes, the jiggly thighs, and the sagging butt. . And often I am taken aback by the older woman who lives in my mirror, but I don't agonize over those things for long.
I would never trade my amazing friends, my wonderful life, my loving family for more shine in my hair or a flatter belly.
As I've aged, I've become more kind to myself, and less critical of myself. I've become my own friend.
I don't chide myself for eating that extra cookie, or for not making my bed, or for buying that silly stone rock face that I didn't need, but looks so avante garde on my patio, in my flowers and in my home.
I am entitled to overeat, to be messy, to be extravagant. I have seen too many dear friends leave this world too soon; before they understood the great freedom that comes with aging.
Whose business is it if I choose to write, draw or paint until 4 am, and sleep until noon?
I will dance with myself to those wonderful tunes of the 70's & 80's in my living room or in my yard as I work, and if I at the same time wish to weep over a lost love, I will.
I will walk the beach in a swim suit that is stretched over a body that has seen better days, and will dive into the waves with abandon if I choose to, despite the pitying glances from the bikini set. They, too, will get older.
I know I am sometimes forgetful. But there again, some of life is just as well forgotten and I eventually remember the important things.


Sure, over the years my heart has been broken. How can your heart not break when you lose a loved one, or a lover disappoints you and leaves your life, or when a child suffers, or even when a beloved pet gets hit by a car? But broken hearts are what give us strength and understanding and compassion. A heart never broken is pristine and sterile and will never know the joy of being imperfect. Imperfection is truly something that needs to be loved, for we are all imperfect.
I have a motto for my home - it is getting painted on the back door this spring and it simply says " I am not an interior decorator, I am a child of the earth. If I can not walk in, kick off my shoes & feel instantly relaxed, Then this is not a home - it's just a house. If all of our friends can't do the same, raid the fridge, change the channel, - then it's not a home, just a house. So - the more imperfections it has the perfect it is. For this IS our HOME, it's not just a house!"
I am so blessed to have lived long enough to have my hair change from all its reds to more blondes, and to have my youthful laughs be forever etched into grooves on my face.
So many have never laughed, and so many have died before their hair could change colors or turn silver. I can say "no", and mean it. I can say "yes", and mean it.
As you get older, it is easier to be positive. You care less about what other people think. I don't question myself anymore. I've even earned the right to be wrong.
So, to answer your question, I like being older. It has set me free. I like the person I have become.
I am not going to live forever, but while I am still here, I will not waste time lamenting what could have been, or worrying about what will be.
For the first time in my life, I don't have to have a reason to do the things I want to do.
And I shall eat dessert every single day. In this life, with my family and friends and loves to come, I am truly blessed. I have figured out what it means to 'be set free'.
Love as there is no tomorrow - love of life, family, friends, lovers, children, hobbies, sunsets, sunrises, the brilliant moon, the meadows, the crazy traffic that makes you slow down and think, the people whose lives you touch even if its only for a moment because they affected you as you affected them. Love! Life is to be enjoyed. Be a child everyday, an adult when you have to. Just BE!


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