We are done with week one.

WE are done with week one of Consolidation. 7 doses of radiation. 4 doses of ARA-C. One dose of Cytoxon, 7 doses of Mercraptaprin (my spelling) and a lot of other stuff. She is up and doing homework. She is remarkably resilient. She has a good attitude and a great spirit.

She is getting more and more tired. Her color is fading and the hair is going. Each and every treatment is like a knife into my heart. The pain I feel is so real. Every time she gives herself a shot, I simply turn away becasuse I can not stand to watch it.

As Mom's we are simply hard wired to protect our children. In the very beginning God knew we, the mother's, had the ability to keep the children safe and make sure the species survived. I know that each and every treatment is necessary. I know that we have to go through the whole process. I know that we are going to beat this thing but the process is so arduous...... I just try to have a good attitude and thank God that we don't live in another time. I remember the part of the "Year of Wonder" where the step-mother tried to comfort the mother whose two young children had died of plague. The stepmother says " I told you not to get attached to them until they are three years old." We are very lucky that my biggest complaint is that the treatment is difficult. We do have treatment, lots of great friends and Sunshine!

Mom is here for a couple of weeks. It is such a great help. Dad took the train from hell to Eugene. He did not get home until 9:00 pm. He reports that you meet interesting people on the train.