Sunday, August 04, 2013

Thing I should have known

1.  Every Family Fights:
There is always something.  Some issues people need to work through.  Often the real issue is with a parent and the parent is gone. So the issues rear their ugly heads and the anger and disappointment and frustration are focused in another direction.  IE Sally is a bad person and awful Sister episodes in this process.  

2.  Be careful you can say things to each other that will forever damage your relationships.  Especially if one party has bottled up all the frustrations and anger for years and even decades.  

3.  There is always more stuff hiding in the corners but the 9 gold coins and the 1 carat ring are not anywhere to be found.

4.  Be prepared to find your dad's shoes. And to cry just a little bit.  

5.  Be very clear about what you want.  If you ask for the Walnut Table that holds the Peacock lamp.  Make sure you use the words " and the Lamp".  Then if you see someone packing it and taking it it is always best to say something and not just take the Finial.  Finials are easily replaced.  Relationships are harder.  

6.  It is okay to snarl at the guy at the yard sale when he offers 25 cents for a 25.00 item.   Just as it is okay to sell the WWI lead solders to a small boy for a 1.00.  
7.  Be prepared to feel odd about leaving your mom at a new home. Be pleasantly surprised she quickly finds new friends and has no time for you.  
8. Be prepared to look down the empty hallway at the former family home and realize it is now just a house. Enough of your life stuff is gone and all of a sudden it is not a home but a place with walls that need paint.  
9.  Home is more than walls and books and a favorite coffee cup but I am not sure what it is exactly
10. Take a few minutes to stop and read your Great Grandmother's letters,  she has wisdom to part.   


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