We watched hours and hours of Dark Shadows. (Vicky Winters has been saved, Matthew is dead, Laura Collins is back and she is a Phoenix and stares for hours into the fire. Burke loves Laura and Vicky but is dating Caroline. No one knows what is in the basement room. Sam Evan's connection to the manslaugter charge is not clear but we are only on episode 144.)
Mary-Elizabeth's GVH is not gone. She has to take a bunch of the steroids again and just cried yesterday. Her line has to stay in, her appointments are more frequent, she has to stay on her immunosupresents longer and she is so so bummed. I am bummed. We are both just sick and tried of this right now.
When this sort of thing happens, we both just crawl into a hole and re-group and re-tool and re-watch 1225 episodes of a long lots soap opera.
It is just no fair. Things were acting like life was good and returning to some sort of normal. I was going to really really figure out the work thing, take care of my clients that are loosing their Mikkelborg home. Start back to water aerobics. I was cooking, and sorting and even going to keep up the laundry after Anne was so nice to do it ALL.
So that is all out the window. My mind can only do so much when it is worried and anxious and afraid and sad and Oh my god I sound like a bad television pharmaceutical commercial.
So what to do..... Today I will hopefully be bringing Meb home and we will start the process again. A little big less sure of good results and tapers. Sometimes it is just what it is. Thinking good thoughts and being positive and happy and all that crap does not work. At least not today. We are pretty good at making the best of things and we will get back to that place.
This episode has just done the job of reminding us that it is a YEAR long program. She can not travel. She can not be more than an hour from the hospital. She can not, she can not, she must, she has to....
Okay. Enough pouting. I will work on making my garden an even more special place then before. My new, yet to be identified humming bird will be identified. I will find more than two varieties of Saliva. I will do some more purging. I will do my laundry. I will organize my pictures, I will.........
Oh, here was last night's dinner. Chef Walter gets awards for this food.
Thank God for Wednesday Austin Pizza Night.