It's Been Awhile

I have not been at my computer for a few days. The wind was knocked out of me on Saturday when I went to Kesly Judd's funeral. Mom insisted on going with me because I come from a long line of "Good Moms". It was a Baptist funeral held in a catholic church. The church was almost full. I will be writing a letter to the Evergreen-Washelli bunch later. I will be using the words RUDE, INSENSTIVE, ________ etc. It was a very moving and yet scary experience.

It has taken be several days to return to a positive and hopeful place. It was a bit like watching news reels and then landing at Normandy. Just put it this way, reality is not a good thing. It is hard to return to that "everything is going to be alright place".

Sally Ann, the 4-6 year old that sometimes rears her ugly head and has a tantrum or can be lots of fun when she invites 18 families to her house to make Gingerbread houses ( all from scratch), has been very very unhappy these last few days. She vividly remembers the day her brother was taken away to the "hospital" and never came back. She remembers the subtle tears in her Mother's eyes when the forgotten Teddy Bear was handed to her mom and she said, "Mommy you forgot Eddie's bear" .

Sometimes, I am caught in the news reels but sometimes is is difficult to remember we are not all in the same one. I will return to that place that is safer and more stable but it is going to take some time. It's like the lot across the street, it took moments for the house to be destroyed and will take months for new houses to appear. They laid the footings and they don't look very sturdy but soon will be reinforced and improved.

It's going to be okay. The Christmas tree is up, the lights are up outside. The advent calendar is up to date and I had good Coffee this morning. Life is good.