Its the Little Things that make the difference

So you think it is the big things.  Cars, Graduations, Birthdays, Trips to the Moon.  When I was a history major, it was the big events the wars, the elections, the disasters that made the history books. 

We don't pay enough attention to the little things.  The stuff that matters but not in a big way.  The person that offers to spend the night. The person that stops and spends five minutes listening.  A dose of zofran and a few moments of being IV free.  The ability to smile and find something positive in an awful situation, the ability to listen.  Just to listen.

 I have been trying to step out of our world of waiting and focus on the lesser events.  So much is swirling around I have to grasp on to something.  We have a roommate and she is having a very difficult time right now.  She is so so quiet and has gone to that deep place where mom's can't find their children.  In better times she is a bright and shiny thing full of life.  She is my role model.  She is the one that says what she thinks, asks for what she wants and needs.  She is older than I am, she is six. 

Last night before I came home, I had a chance to talk with her mom for a bit and when we were both back in the room, Allie got mad at something that was said.   Everyone was busy trying to make her feel better but I took it as a little sign.  She might be very sick right now, she might not be hungry, she might not want to go to the bathroom when people want her to go BUT she is able to be angry.  She is in there somewhere and she is fighting. 

So another day of managing and handling and putting a string of little things together.  A smile, a good cup of coffee, a note to thank someone for their support, while we wait.